The Fire...My Potter

I’ve been doing some pondering about this last year. Had I known what it would hold, I wonder if I would have so readily entered?

It has been a difficult year for me, personally and emotionally. Much of what I encountered and processed through was not open to share in most circles, let alone an open forum such as this. There was stuff my head and heart needed to sift and process through.

As I look back, I am reminded that I am just clay in the Potter’s hand. He promises that He is working on me to make something beautiful of my life… a creation after His own heart.

I want inner beauty. I want to have His heart. I want Him to apply the pressure of molding me. I want Him to squeeze and shape me. I even want the rough brush to caress my skin now and then applying the radiant colors.

This last year found me in more than the uncomfortable, the irritating or the frustrating. This last year found me in the fire…the Refiner’s fire.

I have been on the edge of the oven before, in the heat. This last year I found myself immersed in the center of the flame. The Master Potter saw that it was time to apply some of the heat required to move this piece closer to completion.

I did not like the fire.

There were times I tried to look through the flames to catch just one glimpse of the Master Potter sitting just on the other side, but I couldn’t always see Him. My brain knew He was there but my heart questioned otherwise.

I pleaded and begged to be removed from the fire. I knew it was for my good but I couldn’t see how. Surely there was another way.


As I was turned in the fire, I would catch glimpses of His face, and then once again nothing.

I would hear soft whispers as He spoke, and then silence.

I would feel His hands ever so gently cradled beneath me, and then gone.

I found a range of emotions surge through my spirit as I endured the scorching heat.

I sensed panic, abandonment, anger, questioning, fear, doubt and hurt. In the moments I could catch a glimpse of the Potter, these emotions would settle. And then a few moments in the most intense flames and once again they would surge.

At one point, I began to feel numb. I began to feel some relief, but then it felt so lonely. I couldn’t figure out what was happening. I felt lost and confused. After much soul searching I began to recognize what had happened.


I had removed my own heart from the fire. It was too intense and I did not trust and want it to be there any longer. I was attempting to shelter it, to protect it.

It was hurting. It was painful. It was more than I thought I could take.


I was done. I was good enough for me. I was content to walk around being a selfish, unfinished, ugly piece of pottery. It was much more comfortable… but it was not what was best.

I am aware that the refiner’s fire is required for any piece to be complete. The fire is what brings out the brilliance of the colors that have been applied. The fire is what makes the piece firm, strong, and secure. The fire is a required necessity.

I have learned something about a refiner. He does not take his eyes off the piece he is working on. Regardless if the piece is being molded, or in the very depths of the fire… his eyes remain focused, intent on the work he is fashioning. Although the piece may be completely immersed in the flame, he knows just where it is and how long is required to get the finished effect.

I have heard it said that when a piece is being refined in fire, it is only complete when the potter can see his own reflection in that piece. That takes time. That takes work. That takes patience, craftsmanship, and attentiveness.

That is truly what I want… for God to see His reflection in me. I want others to see His reflection in me. I do not want to be a broken, unfinished piece. I want to be complete... so complete that all that is seen is the beautiful, brilliant reflection of My Master Potter.

II Corinthians 3:18 (Living Bible) "We can be mirrors that brightly reflect the glory of the Lord. And as the Spirit of the Lord works within us, we become more and more like Him."

As I head in to this next year, my heart has once again been placed in the Potter’s Hand. Yes, I myself have returned and placed it there.


I know the fire is required for completion. I have returned, willing to encounter the furnace, the flames, the heat, the intensity… if that is what is needed. My heart eyes see today… His eyes see eternity.

My number one desire is to be used of Him...to glorify Him...to reflect Him.

“Refiner, my Master Potter, help me to have eternal heart eyes that don’t see the things of this moment… but the eternal glory being achieved in my troubles.” (II Cor. 4:17-18)

It is not about me. It can not be about me. It must be about Him!

Even in the fire, I can be assured if that is where He wants me, He will not leave me there alone. I can know that His eyes are forever on me, most intently during the times of the fire, for that is when it is most crucial that the focus remains for completion.

Last year was a year of fire. This year may not be so different, except that my heart is willing to face the fire… if the Master Potter deems it necessary. My heart is willing to encounter whatever is required for His reflection to be seen!

Yes, even if it means another year of the fire.

Celebrating Five Years

Although I only moved to this address about a year and a half ago... five years ago today, "My Quiet Corner" was created.

I remember the days when meme's and awards were a standard post.  I remember when the idea of feeds, stats, SEOs, templates and html weren't even common words used in a post, let alone discussions and "how to's".

I had no idea what to expect from this place. I could not have imagined the road I was to travel, and those of you who would decide to walk it with me. If someone had told me what would transpire... I would not have believed them. It would have seemed impossible.

Yet, five years later, here I am blessed by the presence of each one of you. I hope you find "My Quiet Corner" to be for you what it has become for me. A place to sit and rest a while. A corner to relax and have a moment to reflect. A place of challenge, friendship, support and encouragement.  An opportunity for God's spirit to delve just even a bit further into the depths of heart and soul.

Thanks for coming alongside to challenge me. Thanks for your support and encouragement to lift me when times seemed dark. Thanks for rejoicing with me in the good times, praying with and for me when my heart struggled to find the words to utter, and listening to the many times I would ramble just to sort the jumbled thoughts of my own mind.

"My Quiet Corner" would not be the same without each one of you!! Thanks for the last five great years!
  
Do tell:  Are you a blogger or just a reader of blogs?  When did you start blogging?  What keeps you coming back to a blog?  What do you enjoy most about blogging?

Word of the Year

Each year I ask God to show me a word to focus on for the coming year. Since I have started this practice, I have been amazed at the events that my life encounters directly related to the word of my focus. For example...

Generosity

2009 found this to be my word. I felt a selfishness buried deep in my soul that I knew I needed to work on. I wanted to learn to give of my time, possessions, money, and my very self.

When I selected this word, I had no idea we would be asked to take in our little guy, let alone adopt him.

What God has taught me about my own selfishness has not been easy but oh so necessary. What God has shown me in the Bible and in the world around me about the blessings of generosity has been so revealing and affirming.

Contentment

This was my word the year of 2005... the year that I realized I wanted to quit working FT and be a SAHM mom again. It was a long process. That desire awakened in my heart in Feb. of 2005 and I was not able to change to PT until June of 2007.

I had no idea that God gave me that word for that year knowing that I would need to learn to be content in His plan and His timing.

Discipline

This was my word selected for one year. As I began praying about a new word for the next year, this word continued to come to mind. I soon realized I was not being released from this word. It was my word of the year for two years in a row.

My word for 2010 was...

Grace

When I began the year I was sure my main focus would be learning to extend grace to others. Little did I know that God had plans to venture to the very depths of my soul, and that in those hidden places I would need to learn and be willing to extend grace... to myself.

Even as early as April I was being thrown into the midst of the grace learning process when I shared this song that I have listened to this last year more than I can count.

~~~~~~~~~~
I will readily admit that just because I focus on a specific word for a year does not mean I have mastered it when the year is up. Far from it. I could still use work in the areas of generosity, contentment, discipline, grace... and every word I have chosen as a focus for a year.

What it does mean is that I have many situations experienced, lessons learned and Scriptures revealed that have molded that word deep into my memory and my heart. I have a greater sense of the true meaning of that word and how it should apply in my life.

I do believe that I have direction on my word for 2011. It is not what I originally thought it would be.  For some time I thought I would be doing a second year on grace.  However, I am convinced I that am to move on to the word that has been selected.  

Even in the last couple of days I have become even more convinced that this is the word I am to focus on.  Although it is not the word grace, it is so closely linked I am eager to see how God is going to mingle and mold the two. 

It has not been my practice to share my current word of the year. I leave it between me and God alone. I feel that this allows for a more objective application of it into my life.

Variation

My style is to find Scriptures that apply to my word. I have heard of some people that choose a Scripture to focus on for the year.

Either way, I find it a great exercise in personal character growth. To have something that is a specific area of focus keeps me aware of the situations around me and chiseling away at the debris in my heart that needs a bit of attention.

Have you ever tried a similar thing before? Do you have a similar practice?

If you don't and would like to give it a try I would encourage you to go for it!

Diapers, Noses and Eternity

Do you sometimes wonder how to appropriately apply a sermon given? I find for myself that sometimes it takes a bit of stepping back and thinking outside of the ordinary.

Yesterday's sermon was about evaluating our time and how we spend it. One of the points was to spend our time wisely by keeping eternity in mind. To make our moments count for eternity.

I'll be honest, one question that came to mind was, "So, how does one make changing diapers, scraping cheerios off of the floor, and keeping up with the many but mundane (and often not so glamorous) tasks in the everyday count for eternity?"

Almost immediately I was reminded of this quote from Dee Breston as she reflected on mothering her own young children.

"I was not wiping bottoms and noses, I was nurturing an eternal soul."

Yes! That is how daily diapers, laundry, dishes, dinners, schoolwork and every other mundane task that fills our days so routinely can impact eternity.

Whether it's our children, husbands or just others that surround us in our days...

We have the opportunity, the potential and can in fact be... nurturing eternal souls...

What eternal soul(s) will you have the incredible privilege to nurture today?

Celebrating... God With Us

Isaiah 7:14 (NLT) "The Lord himself will give you the sign. Look! The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son and will call him Immanuel (which means ‘God is with us’).

Matthew 1:23 (NLT) “Look! The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel, which means ‘God is with us.’”

Celebrating the gift of His Presence. Immanuel... God with us. Jesus!

Merry Christmas to each one of you!

His Mess... My Mess

He came to a mess... to save me from mine.

Overwhelmed.

Humbled.

Grateful.

I am the Decoration

Angela recently shared the following at Traci Michele's.

"As humbling as it feels, I’ve realized that I am the decoration of the season. I am the twinkling lights that spread cheer to those who bask in my glow. I am the beautiful melody of the Christmas carol, the spicy aroma of warm gingerbread, and the sweet creamy taste of eggnog. I set the stage for holiday cheer. And I can ruin it all with a bad attitude."

Being mindful that the way I approach the final days of this season impacts not only my own experience, but that of those around me... especially my husband and children.

Striving to be a beautiful "decoration" that reflects the light, beauty and glory of Him alone... the Reason we even celebrate this season.

Photo Credit: My little sis.

What Line are You In?

As we enter the final week of preparations for Christmas, I am reminded to seek the line of most importance.



Where's the Line to See Jesus
By Becky Kelley

Christmas time was approaching
Snow was starting to fall
Shoppers choosing their presents
People filling the mall
Children waiting for Santa
With excitement and glee
A Little boy tugged my sweater
Looked up and asked me,

CHORUS:
"Where's the line to see Jesus?
Is He here at the store?
If Christmas time is His birthday,
Why don't we see Him more?
Where's the line to see Jesus?
He was born for me.
Santa Clause brought me presents,
But Christ gave His life for Me."

As I stood in amazement
At this message profound
I looked down to thank him
He was no where around.
A little boy at the mall
Might as well had wings
As the tears filled my eyes
I thought I heard him sing:

Chorus...

In the blink of an eye,
At the sound of His trumpet,
We'll all stand in line at His throne.
Every knee shall bow down.
Every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord.

Chorus...

Where's the line? Where's the line? Where's the line?

Twas the Night... for Moms

The Night Before Christmas for Moms
Author Unknown

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the abode,
only one creature was stirring, and she was cleaning the commode.

The children were finally sleeping, all snug in their beds,
while visions of Nintendo and Barbie flipped through their heads.

The dad was snoring in front of the TV,
with a half-constructed bicycle sitting on his knee.

So only the mom heard the reindeer hooves clatter,
which made her sigh, “Now what’s the matter?”

With toilet bowl brush still clutched in her hand,
she descended the stairs, and saw the old man.

He was covered with ashes and soot, which feel with a shrug.
“Oh great,” muttered the mom, “Now I have to clean the rug.”

“Ho-ho-ho!” cried Santa, “I’m glad you’re awake.
Your gift was especially difficult to make.”

Thanks, Santa, but all I want is some time alone.”
“Exactly!” He chuckled, “I’ve made you a clone.”

“A clone?” she asked, “What good is that?
Run along Santa, I’ve no time for a chat.”

The mother’s twin, same hair, same eyes, same double chin.
“She’ll cook, she’ll dust, and she’ll mop every mess.

You relax, take it easy,
and get some real rest.”

“Fantastic!” the mom cheered. “My dream come true!
I’ll shop. I’ll read. I’ll sleep a whole night through!”

From the room above, the youngest began to fret.
“Mommy?! I’m scared… and I’m wet.”

The clone replied, “I’m coming sweetheart.”
“Hey”, the mom smiled, “She knows her part.”

The clone changed the small one, and hummed a tune,
as she bundled the child, in a blanket cocoon.

“You’re the best mommy ever. I really love you.”
The clone smiled and sighed, “I love you, too.”

The mom frowned and said, “Sorry, Santa, no deal!
That’s my child’s love she’s trying to steal.”

Smiling wisely Santa said, “To me it is clear.
Only one loving mother is needed here.”

The mom kissed her child, and tucked her into bed.
“Thank you, Santa, for clearing my head.

I sometimes forget, it won’t be very long,
when they’ll be too old for my cradle-song.”

The clock on the mantle began to chime.
Santa whispered to the clone, “It works every time.”

With the clone by his side Santa said, “Goodnight.
Merry Christmas Mom, you’ll be alright.”
~~~~~~~~~~

Having teenagers and believing in family, I also enjoyed the one Susanne shared.

Permission to Rest and Listen

Every year that I hear these words from the carol "It Came Upon a Midnight Clear", it is always such an encouragement to me! Have you really ever noticed them or read the encouraging message these words bring?

And ye beneath life's crushing load whose forms are bending low
Who toil along the climbing way with painful steps and slow
Look up for glad and golden hours come swiftly on the wing
O rest beside the weary road and hear the angels sing.

To me they speak of hope, joy and peace all in one. I desire to be intentional in "resting" beside the weary road. I want to take a few extra moments in the spaces of my days and listen oh so closely to "hear the angels sing".

What about you...?

If you aren't already, go ahead and spend some time this season taking the permission you've been given... to rest and listen.

Happiness Vs. Joy

Today was the 3rd Sunday of Advent, the Sunday of Joy. I've been contemplating the difference between happiness and joy. There is a difference you know!

Happiness is fleeting. It is circumstantial. Happiness is dependent on other factors. Happiness is not an emotion we feel all the time. I must admit, sometimes I am far from happy.

However, joy is different. Joy comes from deep within. Joy can be present regardless of the circumstances and situations surrounding us.

I once heard this definition of joy: "Joy: Peace dancing in your heart."


Capture a picture of that for a minute. Peace dancing... regardless of what all else is happening... there is peace. That peace is not just sitting still becoming stagnant, it's dancing! Dancing in your heart, the very depths of your soul!!

Peace dancing in the very depths of your soul... that my friends is joy!

"Joy is more than my spontaneous expression of laughter, gaiety, and lightness. It is deeper than an emotional expression of happiness. Joy is... God in my life as I walk with Him." -- Bonnie Monson

Life as I walk with God. That is true joy!

Walking with God requires action. To walk is a verb. We must be active in the process. We must walk. We find that joy by seeking God and His face, by being in His presence.

This is not a joy that can come from a new car, a new house, gifts in pretty packages, or anything else we might think would bring us joy. This joy, this peace dancing in our hearts, comes from God alone...walking with Him and being in His presence.


Psalm 43:3-4 (NLT)
"Send out your light and your truth; let them guide me. Let them lead me to your holy mountain, to the place where you live. There I will go to the altar of God, to God—the source of all my joy."

Psalm 16:11 (NLT)
"You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever. "

God is the only one who brings that true joy into our lives. It is that joy, that peace dancing, that can be and is the giver of our strength... even in the most difficult times.


Nehemiah 8:10b (NLT)
"Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!”

Psalm 28:7-8a (NLT)
"The Lord is my strength and shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving. The Lord gives his people strength. "

As we seek God, as we actively walk with God, as we depend on Him...He gives us His joy. He gives us His peace dancing in our hearts and His strength. It is nothing we can attain or achieve on our own. It comes from Him and Him alone.

Whatever circumstance we find ourselves in, whether happy or sad, whether exciting or tragic, whether energizing or exhausting... we can have joy.

From the very depths of our beings, our souls can rest in His plans. Our "moments" find strength to push forward in His strength. Our hearts can dance the dance of peace... the dance of joy.

When it is all said and done, we can give thanks and praise to His name. He has done great things! We have been filled with joy... a peace dancing... because of Him!

Psalm 9:1-3 (NLT)
I will praise you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done. I will be filled with joy because of you."


May you be filled with joy this season. Not happiness, for that can change in a moment's notice. No, I do not hope for only happiness. That is not enough to sustain you in the things life has to offer. Happiness is not near enough.

My hope and prayer is that you be filled with joy. May you seek the giver of all joy. May you find yourself walking with Him... side by side and hand in hand.

Regardless of what you are facing, decisions you are making, plans you have, and hopes you dream...may you look deep into the depths of your heart. As you look into the very depths of your heart and soul, may you find joy there...

Joy: Peace dancing in your heart!

Dry Times Dark Times

I am being reminded that there is a difference between "dry" times and "dark" times.

Dry Times

Dry times result when we do not actively pursue our relationship with Jesus. When we are busy with other things. When we are preoccupied, distracted, maybe even "doing" ministry. We just aren't making time for Him, pursuing a relationship with Him, and/or communicating and listening to Him.

Dry times are something I can change. I am in control of how long these times last. I can resolve these times by getting back on my face before God, by rekindling that relationship, by returning to Him.

Malachi 3:7 (NIV) "Return to me and I will return to you."

James 4:8 (NIV) Come near to God and He will come near to you."

He is there waiting for me. I just have to take the first step. I do not have to be in the dry place longer than what I allow myself to be. It is not that He is being silent during these times... it is that I am not listening.

Dark Times

Dark times, on the other hand, often occur when we are seeking the Lord and occupied with Him, yet we feel our prayers bounce off the ceiling. Silence.

These times tend to lead to statements like, "God, Where are you?, Why aren't you speaking? Why can't I feel you? Why can't I see you? It is so dark."

In her book "Listening for God", Marilyn Hontz shares that these are the times He uses to teach us to depend on Him for who he is and not how we feel about him. This time forces us to trust the Lord alone and not our feelings.

"God often speaks loudest in His silence. These times can be spiritually enriching." -- Marilyn Hontz

So how do these dark times spiritually enrich my life? How does God speak loudest during these times?

Is it because I have to listen so very quietly, to look so very carefully, to strain to see one sign, to work so hard to feel one little thing of Him? And why do I depend on my feelings so much anyway?

Then truth makes itself known.

I can't depend on my feelings. I must depend on Him for who He is. I must trust in Him based on what I know of Him and His character.

The only place I can learn about Him, who He is, and His character... is in His word, the Bible. Could it be that these times of "silence" (no feelings) are so spiritually enriching because these are the times that drive me hard into His word?

When things seem to be going well, when all is as it should be, when I'm "feeling" Him and His presence, do I pursue Him in his word like I do when He's quiet? Do I read until I find a truth? Do I crave for any new insight from Him? Do I examine my world under a microscope looking for the smallest of signs that He is still around, that He exists, that He still cares?

I would have to say that during the "good" times I read His word with more of an "amen, uh-huh, beautiful, absolutely right" type of attitude.

During the dark times I read, study, take apart, and digest everything I can looking for some truth, some encouragement, something to hold on to, to cling to, to be a promise for my heart alone.

I long to learn something about Him and who He is and will be for me... something new about His character.

Maybe that's why these dark times come? Times when I need to be driven into Him... hard.

I can't determine the length of these times. He knows what I need to learn. He knows what I need to see. He knows what changes need to occur in my heart and spirit before I can come out on the other side.

My only choices in the "dark times" are either to continue with Him, pursuing this life as he has called me to live it... OR to give it up and lose all that I have, everything I've worked for. This life must be one of daily obedience, surrender, and commitment.

I can choose to follow at all costs, or not. The choices are pretty simple really.

"I know it is lonely, but keep going! You will come out of that dark, long tunnel with a deeper knowledge of God. This is a time when, in faith, you love him purely for who you know him to be - not just for what he can do for you or how he makes you feel. Continue to pursue God." -- Marilyn Hontz

I believe I can be in a dry time. I believe I can be in a dark time. I believe to be in either place "feels" the same... silence, alone, dark, desperate.

When I am there... in either one of those places... I must determine in my heart which place it is.

Am I in the dry place? Dry because I haven't been spending time with Him? If so, I need to reconcile that!

Am I in a dark place? I know I am spending time with Him, I know I am moving forward in obedience...and yet He seems so distant. During these times I've got to hold on for dear life, to persevere, and to trust Him for who I KNOW (not feel!) Him to be.

The beauty of either of these places? They should each drive me hard into His Word, prayer and pursuing HIM!!